Real Life

My cheer team has been more and more intrigued by my wedding as it gets closer and closer. Some of their questions make me laugh really hard. Often after I answer they respond with, "For my wedding..." And I just smile at them.

I mean, should I burst their bubble? Their wedding probably won't be how they imagine or dream it to be right now. Just once I casually mentioned the foreign concept that maybe, just maybe, their groom to be will have an opinion about the day too. To which they respond with looks of horror!! How dare this fictional man contradict a single detail of their dream wedding!!

They are in high school, so I don't push the issue.

But what I want to say is this: real life is different than that dream world of yours!

This wedding process has not been what I imagined it to be. I was never a girl to dream in detail about my wedding because I never felt guaranteed the gift of marriage. Sure, I had some picture of what I would want the day to look like, but I didn't spend hours upon hours dreaming up this day. This wedding process has been the beginning of bringing two families together, and that is just not always (ever?) easy. There's been lots of give and take, compromise, and refocusing on the main thing. I'm so excited for our wedding day; it will be one of the best days of my life to date. But I'm far more excited for our marrige.

I wish I could convince these girls to hold loosely to all their wedding dreams, but I know that it won't actually mean anything right now.

Because what's way better than the wedding they are envisioning, is the real life romance which is better than any chick flick they watch. I've watched a girly movie or two with these girls, and now that I'm very much in love with Adam, I always feel the need to tell them that romance as portrayed in movies is not real. But the real version is so. much. better.

They've often said, "Why can't real life be like the movies?" And I'm just so thankful it's not. I'm so thankful that falling in love takes longer than the 2 weeks we see in a movie. The beauty of being truly known by the man you love does not compare to any cheesy chick flick.

Their real life wedding will probably be different than the one they are dreaming about; I can only hope their real life love story will be far better than the ones they see on TV and think they want.

November 17

We're getting married in a month!! This picture is from April, but I feel like this could've been yesterday. Or Tuesday. Or Monday. Get the idea?

30 more days.

Now or Never

It's no secret that I'm an ultra-competitive person. I can turn literally anything into a competition. Adam and I will race each other down the stairs, to the car, in the grocery store, etc. I turn conditioning into competitions for my team all. the. time. No shave November is a current competition with my team (I will win). I thrive on competition, but I hate losing. Hate it.

This year, my team is competing for the first time, and I'm thrilled about it. I started planning their competition season, routine, music- all of it- before the season ever started. In fact, last year's season wasn't even over yet. Coaching a team that didn't compete last year was a challenge for me. This is where I feel most natural.

Having said that, my focus is not entirely on competition. Not even close. Last winter I picked the theme "Now or Never" for them, and it's what we come back to all the time. Though it has implications for our team physically and mentally, the main thing is this: our time is now to walk in who God created us to be and to further His kingdom wherever we are right now. I don't expect crazy accolades from them; I just desperately want them pushing each other towards good works and deeper relationships with Jesus. If we can't get this aspect right, we're doomed on the competition mat.

Though at times I feel like I'm fighting an upward battle solo, I get glimpses of hope that they're "getting it."

We're 26 days away from our first competition. Yes, they compete a week before our wedding. I know, I know. I'm crazy.

I spend HOURS thinking about these girls, their competitions, their strengths, their weaknesses, and everything that needs to happen in the next few weeks. As a coach, I battle all the time with lowering my expectations or pulling them up to where I want them. Poor Adam has heard far more about this team than he ever wanted to hear. So many times he'll say, "Just let me condition them one time!" They might not live to see a second time.

Yesterday at church, I kept thinking about my team and my desire to see them be people of hope here at Cedar Park. I want them living out their relationships with Jesus in a real and authentic way. We sang The Stand, and I had a mental picture of us arms locked together and lifted high with hearts abandoned before the Lord. That is what I want. More than earning respect. More than gym space to practice in. More than a super talented team. More than winning state. I want a team unified before the Lord, wholly surrendered before Him.

This has been my hardest season of coaching simply because coaching their hearts is equally as hard as coaching their skills. I love my team more than I can explain, but they have challenged me to be a better coach, better mentor, and better giver of grace. I often leave practices flat out stumped. I feel like I'm constantly asking God for wisdom and strength when it comes to leading them.

I do feel very strongly about this cheer season. God has a unique thing for us this year, and I want to soak everything out of it that I can. It's now or never, and my prayer is that we pick NOW.

We must.

In Case You Were Wondering...

Yes. I do have to go to a football game tonight that is an hour and a half away with an 8:00 start time that is expected to be 36 degrees. Go Eagles!

Yes. I do have all of my report cards to do because I haven't started any of them. They don't need to be finished until the 18th, so naturally, I'll wait a little bit longer.

Yes. My wedding dress has arrived!! I get to try it on after work on Monday.

Yes. I do crave Mexican food on an almost daily basis. I've been meeting that craving with my awesome queso fresco & chipotle flavored Laughing Cow cheese. So, correct. It doesn't come close to actually meeting the craving.

Yes. I am taking vitamin C everyday, but I feel like I'm coming really close to getting sick. The lack of sleep probably is the problem.

Yes. I am getting married in 43 days. And one of the most helpful tips from premarital counseling thus far is this: don't discuss problems if your heart rate is over 100. Take a timeout instead. I actually applied this in practice last week. I could tell my heart rate shot up because I was mad, so I called a literal timeout.

Yes. It pains me that I haven't gotten to cuddle my new niece. She is beautiful.

Yes. I wore the same shirt twice this week. On purpose.

Yes. The basement in which I live is positively freezing each morning. Taking a shower in the morning is just too painful.

Yes. I'm trying to avoid cleaning my classroom.