This Isn't Easy

I'm 28 weeks pregnant, in the 3rd trimester, and feeling somewhat whale-like. I can't believe my belly is going to continue to grow for roughly 12 more weeks.  Whereas I definitely want Henry to keep growing, I'd like to personally stop growing. 

At our check-up on Wednesday, we found out Henry is/was head down, and I'm measuring great. I only gained 2.5 pounds from 23 to 27 weeks. Before you give me a high five, I got a stomach virus that severely impacted my weight gain this past month. Nonetheless, I felt victorious, but I'm expecting a depressing number next month. 

That's my pregnancy update.

A few weeks ago, Adam and I went to Babies R Us to register because my cheerleaders were throwing me a shower. We were kind of following the guide they gave us, kind of not. At least when we were registering for our wedding, we had a general idea of what we wanted and needed. But we've never done this parenting thing before, so we just did our best. 

As we've talked through what we've felt like we need for this baby, we both have been trying to keep things to a minimum. We don't want oodles and oodles of baby stuff. We aren't going to go buy new furniture for him. We're not going to go crazy on his nursery. Not because we don't want to but because we just don't know how much longer we'll be here. And accumulating a lot of stuff is just more stuff for us to either get rid of or pack up and move. 

Adam sat down in a chair at the store and had a moment with me. This feeling of Seattle not being home is getting old. Knowing that we want to leave sometime soon makes staying filled with tension. As badly as Adam wants to have a house and a place that is definitely ours, we don't want that place to be here. 

We miss our friends. We miss our families. We miss being known. I've been reflecting on why certain aspects of life have seemed harder than before. Pursuing Jesus alongside of others seems easier. Engaging the community around me seems easier when I'm doing it with others who are driven by the same desire to see Jesus's reign known here on Earth. Believing in faith with others is life giving and contagious. 

And that's just not the world we live in right now. But it can be.

Since we're going to be moving this summer, we're probably going to move churches in hopes of gaining community that is more contextual for us. We want people we can do life with while we're here. We're not giving up yet!!

On a positive note, we're so excited to see our boy (at the end of July!). I really want to see his sweet face and hold him. I want to kiss his cheeks and pinch his booty. I'm curious if he'll be as active outside of my belly as he is inside. Because the kid moves SO. MUCH. I cannot wait to see Adam with his son. I think I might dissolve into a puddle as I watch him hold his boy. 

Also. The boy has a name. It will remain a secret until he arrives, but it's nice that we've finally agreed on something. 

Here's some pictures of our recent trip to the Tulip Festival just an hour north of where we live.

It was kind of insane!! The colors were amazing, and tulips were EVERYWHERE! 

And...I'm 28 weeks pregnant.