The Baby Bump

People warned me. But when I was in the early stages of pregnancy, I was feeling so sick that I couldn't really take in the warnings. I was just wanting to get past the stage of throwing up right before bed only to throw up right after I woke up. 

But now this "baby bump" is my reality. People stare- as if they've never seen a pregnant woman before. They ask questions. They touch my stomach. It's been bizarre to experience the lack of boundaries people have just because I'm pregnant. 

Most people's comments are nice, but sometimes they're not. I'm sure my pregnant self is less tolerant than my non-pregnant self when it comes to people speaking without thinking. Someone asked me a few weeks ago, "Are you sure there's not two in there??" WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME THAT?!?! What I just heard was, "You are so large and elephant-like that the only possible explanation for your stomach is that there are multiple babies in there!" Thank you. From the bottom of my pregnant heart, thank you.

To be honest, my growing bump has been something that's been both exciting and exasperating. I love feeling this kid move so much. I love watching my stomach move as he moves. I love that my belly is a safe place for Henry to grow. Sometimes he feels so close to the surface of my tummy that I feel like the only thing keeping me from touching my baby is one very thin layer of skin. 

But there are things that I do not love about my always growing bump. I can't reach my toes anymore. Rolling over in bed is just a challenge. I'm always hot. Always. 

For a while I just plain did not like looking in the mirror. I was constantly aware of other pregnant girls who are much smaller than me. Or much bigger than me. I feel like I was constantly looking around at others to either reassure myself that I wasn't that bad or guilt trip myself because "so-and-so" still runs 4 miles everyday {which is mind boggling to this exhausted pregnant person}. 

And then I got tired of it all.

Last time I was at the doctor's office, I didn't even look at the scale when I weighed in because I didn't want to know anymore. What matters to me is that Henry is growing at the correct rate, even if I personally am ahead of the curve. 

For the most part, I've embraced my baby bump. I'm going to get bigger in the next 6-7 weeks. I know that. And I'm okay with it. Because I honestly love that I get to be this baby's mom. I cannot wait to meet him. He's worth the expanded figure and inconveniences of pregnancy. 

I had a preschooler's mom come up to me before school one day and tell me that her daughter was talking about me one day. She said to her mom, "Mrs. Tomberlin is the most beautiful ever. I know it's because of that baby in her tummy!" 

Let me assure you that is so far from how I feel on a daily basis. But I do think there is great beauty in this baby bump. I'm carrying new life inside of me. As the weeks pass on, the thrill of this little guy grows and grows- just like my belly. And I do like that.