My Girl

 My Happy Big Girl,

You are two!! Which technically means, you are no longer a baby. But you most certainly are still my baby. You are perpetual sunshine and joy in this house, and we all love you so much. Sometimes when you are squealing with absolute glee while playing with your brothers and your Daddy, I will wonder, "What would we have done without her?" Because it seems like we all needed you here with us. 

I'm convinced that 1 year olds hold a special magic, and I think maybe you were the most magical of them all. Your one year old life was lived through hard days. The pandemic continued to at times smother us with fear, stress, and worry. But it was no match for your joy. Now, we have been fortunate that covid has not produced dire despair close to home, like it has for others. But the weight of these days was sometimes overwhelming. But then you would lay your little self against me, and you would settle that perfect head against my shoulder, grabbing my hair for security, and I would breathe you in. Deeply. Holding you close and rocking both of us. Daddy and I take turns putting you to bed each night, and I think we both needed those moments of slowing down to hold you close. It steadied us in the midst of so much darkness. 

We are all crazy about you. Your laugh. Your smile. The way you babble with so much certainty, though we have no clue what you are saying. You are so easy to love, so easy to enjoy. You are everyone's favorite girl, Elliana. 

We walked through a really hard season before you came into the world, and we walked through some more hard this year that has us holding onto you tight. For the first time, I felt sadness about this milestone of your life. I have delighted in every bit of your growth, just to the brim grateful that you were here with us. But I confess that I have felt sadness creep in as I watch you stomp right on out of the baby years and into more independence. While I know that I am actually so happy that you are healthy and capable to do that stomping, it has tugged on my mama heart differently this year. 

I know I won't always be the best part of your days, so I'm staying present right now, savoring who you are and storing up all these precious days and moments with you. Elliana Joy, you are a JOY and a delight. I couldn't love you more. 

I want to give you a bear hug!! I love you, big girl. Always and forever!

Love,

Mommy

Year 2 of Elliana

 I cannot believe Elliana is 2. I love, love, love my kids as 1 year olds, and Elliana did not disappoint. Most of her precious life has been during the pandemic. In a world of so much sadness and chaos and uncertainty, oh my gracious, I'm so thankful we had Elliana Joy to be a perpetual bright spot. 

Obviously, a lot changes in the year between turning 1 and turning 2. Like, she couldn't even walk a year ago. She figured it out mid September, and she quickly progressed from walking to running because she is a third child. Adam started when she was way too little (in my opinion) walking on the road for neighborhood walks, and she would be just utterly thrilled with herself. Adam has so many cute videos of the two of them on walks together. 

I heard so many times that Nolan and Isaac are "all boy." Well. Elliana is definitely a girl. She cares about what she wears, and anytime she puts a dress on, she wants her daddy to see her and dote on her. She is currently on a tie-dye kick. She wants to wear it every.single.day. She will throw an actual fit about not liking what I want to put on her. It seems like she has far more emotions than the boys! But it's perhaps just the way she expresses her feelings that's different. While she's a bit of a girly girl, she can also march around outside in the mud with the boys and hold her own. I love the balance!

Elliana is the sibling that is pretty much always well received. The boys do get frustrated with her at times, but for the large majority, she is met with adoration and affection from the boys. Sometimes too much. 

Elliana is a mama's girl through and through right now. Like with my boys, I expect her allegiance to change eventually. But for the time being, her first choice is Mommy. Because of Covid, I'm convinced our bond is stronger. She does still test my patience with her opinions and feelings, but she has been a healing balm to my heart in so many ways. She loves pulling up a chair to bake with me at the island. Sometimes she even likes when I put on my workout. And I've become increasingly aware- this girl is watching me. And it's scary! 

There is possibly no one more smitten with Elliana than her Daddy. The amount of times Adam just smiles at her and says, "She's the cutest girl in the whole world," or something like that- too many to count! Sometimes we'll watch videos or look at pictures after the kids go to bed, and he'll ask, "Should we go get her up?" And I think he actually would. He loves her so much! I'm confident Elliana has been a force of healing in Adam's heart, too. 

This one- she gets so excited about the littlest things. Her smile is literally the best. She loves being tickled and chased. She loves chocolate, and she'll often grab candy in the checkout lines at stores, exclaiming, "CHOCOLATE!" She has watched and danced to Every Move I Make at least 1,000 times- not exaggerating!! She LOVES my parents' dog, Jax. She loves the beach! She's probably my best dinner eater of the 3 (comparing them as 2 year olds). She still sleeps with her pacifiers, and it will be tough for her to stop. This girl- she's irresistible! I'm so, so thankful for her! I always said that I would be happy with all boys, but I was wrong. I desperately needed Elliana Joy. 

The brightest sunshine there ever was!! Elliana Joy, I'm your biggest fan! 

8 Years of Nolan

 Nolan Alex is eight years old! 

This past year Nolan did first grade at our public school. It was a very bizarre year in the midst of the pandemic, BUT! Nolan had an amazing teacher who really cared about him. He did really, really well in almost all areas of school, and we learned that he does not have a math brain. 

Nolan is CRAZY about animals and nature! He loves learning facts about any and all creatures. He is especially interested in reptiles right now. He has spent HOURS outside catching and releasing lizards. When we were at Lighthouse for a retreat, he caught 50+ lizards that week. 

Nolan, Isaac, and Adam have all become quite the fishermen. It all started during COVID, but they have come to really love it. Freezing cold, blazing hot- they will go. Nolan loves watching YouTube videos about fishing. He says he wants to grow up to "be a fisherman and catch bigger and better bass." That's what he wrote over and over in first grade when asked what he wanted to be when he's older. 

Nolan ADORES Elliana, and is a very, very good big brother to her. For the longest time Elliana called both boys, "Isaac." But she figured it out eventually and is quite fond of both her brothers, but Nolan is especially good with her. When Adam and I debated keeping Elliana in Georgia while the boys went to North Carolina during our anniversary trip, I ultimately decided she needed to stay with Nolan because she was so attached to him. I knew he would help her feel safe. 

Nolan is a super smart, very athletic kid. He really likes to be right. He gets along with pretty much everyone at school, and his teachers RAVE about him. He's such a good reader. He's still fast as lightning. He can down a hamburger. He's actually a great dancer, thanks to all of the go noodle dances he did at school. I love when he lets loose and starts dancing. He's starting to develop a good sense of humor and is getting the hang of comedic timing. He challenges me in so many ways, and I fail so often. I don't know if it's because he's the first or because we are prone to butt heads, but he sure does keep me humble. 

Oh, Nolan, you sure are cute!! I love you more than you'll ever know!