Behold

Right after I shared about the mounting stress and ever present chaos, I decided I should devote more time to reading Scripture. I went home that night and read Isaiah 43, which I love. It's starts off saying,

"But now thus says the Lord,

he who created you, O Jacob,

he who formed you, O Israel:

'Fear not, for I have redeemed you;

I have you called you by name, you are mine.'"

Um. That is awesome.

Created. Formed. Don't fear. Redeemed. Called by name. Mine. That's verse 1.

"'When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;

and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;

when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,

and the flame shall not consume you.

For I am the Lord your God,

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

I gave Egypt as your ransom,

Cush and Seba in exchange for you.

Because you are previous in my eyes,

and honored, and I love you,

I give men in return for you,

peoples in exchange for your life.'"

Talk about a loving God who desired intimate, covenant relationship with a broken, sinful people. Did I say desired? Hmm. Desires is more like it.

As I was reading the chapter, I was moved by God's relentless pursuit of his people. The nation of Israel just could not grasp the love God had for them. I kept reading the chapter and came to these verses...

"Thus says the Lord, who makes a way in the sea,

a path in the mighty waters,

who brings forth chariot and horse, army and warrior;

they lie down, they cannot rise,

they are extinguished, quenched like a wick:

'Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old.

Behold, I am doing a new thing;

now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?

I will make a way in the wilderness

and rivers in the desert.

The wild beasts will honor me,

the jackals and the ostriches,

for I give water in the wilderness,

rivers in the desert, to give drink to my chosen people,

the people whom I formed for myself

that they might declare my praise."

Behold. I am doing a new thing.

I read that quite a few times and knew that I needed to accept that God was doing a new thing this year. I could keep looking back to the greatness of last year (in regards to work), but it would be better for everyone involved if I would just behold the new thing God was doing. New kids. New schedule. New demands. I saw all of this as negative. But I am starting to perceive that it's not all bad.

God will provide water. Water is often symbolic of life in the Bible. And that's essentially what I reminded myself that night. God is the Source. He will provide life for me, that I might declare his praise.

I'm happy to report that Adam got a job this week. Immediate praise flowed from our mouths. That was much needed "water" that God provided. I'm very grateful for it.

Right now my desire is to just behold what God is doing for this season. I do miss my kids (and parents) from last year very much, but it's this year. Our pastor passed on a quote from Jim Elliot that I liked a lot, "Wherever you are, be all there." That's what I'm working on right now. I am confident God has good things for this year, and my heart needs to be drawn closer to His. The preschoolers and cheerleaders for this season, are just for this season. I would hate to miss opportunities to be a person of hope, love, and grace in their lives.

Behold.